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~got nothing but toejam~
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Monday, May 15, 2006

"Dear New Neighbour[s],


Now, if you could possibly see your way to doing two things...

Please restain your visitors and sometimes residents from parking bang smack in the middle of the communal driveway. As you know there is a lovely big patch of parking grass just near the mailboxes.

Also if you could shut the hell up when leaving in the early morning, that, would also be much appreciated. Being woken up with your yap going full bloody flap in the wee hours of a morning really chaps our arse.


The Others.

Yes. Oh. My. God. OTHER people do in fact live here."

This letter will be placed in their mailbox this arvo after the post lady has jetted on by on her souped up postie bike. Dunno what it will do...but hell can only be either "good" or "interesting".

Was gunna add that JackieSue [and insert a copy of my cartoon of her] will beat them up if they don't quit being a bad neighbour but that might have just made them curious enough to continue with their "inconsiderate fucker's" crap.

So I still got *heh* that threat up me sleeve.

Think I might make up some "bad neighbour" certificates with maybe the "indiscretion" noted on it. Dole them out via their mailbox depending how badly they gone and made me pissy.

*note to self*...Do not swear at them...or mention bodily harm from me personally. That’s where the goddess and buddha and jesus will come in.

Three no five certificates. Gotta be fair. I mean they may just have a bad case of fucktoidism so it is correctable.

Heh I’m kinda getting into this.

Ohh I hope they aren't undercover cops pretending to be drillers because I just put the letter out there in their box. Didn’t wait for the postie...I saw Doug go out there so donned me sunnies with the envelope stuffed down me duds and joined him. Nor did I "glove up"...hmmm perhaps i need to burn off my fingerprints.

But geez look what happens when I get up early...two posts and one "up yours" in the one day. That can't be good.

[added later]

Hee. First certificate completed...

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Posted by apositivepessimist :: 2:05 am :: 16 comments

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