Thursday, March 15, 2007
Heaar Yeee, Hear YE.
I am now ensconced in my parents heavenly treed and rocked property. I am Lord and Queen of all that I see.
But I've decided to still retain my common touch.
I am alpha bitch in the canine department; dog feeder, thrower of various balls and chief dog
yeller...mainly when the beastly things take turns in sneaking in a long lick up the back of my legs or stepping on the back of my thong
forcing me to a sudden halt, which in turn makes them collide with me, with their hanging out tongues. By the end of my reign here they will both know the meaning of the word "GAAAHH!!".
I have five...yes that's right FIVE tv channels to choose from. I need to buy a tv guide. I forget what's on the two channels I couldn't get before.
I have discovered that my mother is a serial purchaser. None of that buying in piddly amounts it's serious bulk buying all the way dudes. Fer instance I just counted 120 rolls of toilet paper out in the laundry cupboard. While exploring her walk in pantry I came across her tub of dried fruit. Mmmm dried apricots, loike fucking yum. Bleech dates. Mmmm dried plums. I ate 21 of them, yes I counted the seeds, before I thought, hmmm hold on don't you eat prunes to help yer do poo's? A couple of hours later I found that to be true. You do. By the time I have eaten my way through her dried fruit tub I will re-count those loo rolls.
Being out here, isolated can be a wee bit funny like at night. I of course keep hearing "noises". Won't stop me from sleeping tho. I figure if something
were to happen it was meant too. Not like I'm gunna go and lock the doors...well not ALL of them. Just the one's closest to my bedroom. Arhaaha figure it might give me a fighting chance against the "something".
Now. YOU get to *shout*...“Eeeek RUN Apos!! Ruuuun!”
at yer monitor.
Labels: Heh. Educating The Unlucky Bastids, Toejam
Posted by apositivepessimist ::
8:17 pm ::
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