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~got nothing but toejam~
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Wednesday, September 20, 2006

Dunno what got into me last night...

But I was positively smiling at fellow shoppers...and no ye bunch of rotters I'm not talking about my snarly bared teeth smile either. It was genuine smiling. I even did it at the shopping challenged shoppers. You know the ones, them that just drift over to the shelves whilst their trolley stays in the middle of the aisle. I can honestly report that I didn't bounce any of the four trolleys I came across like that outta the way once.

Fuck! How good am I aye? Go on, tell me how good I am! I need the validation. Well occasionally I do, usually I just don't give a bugger what yers think. Ha!

But yes, I was the one with the happy face smilun at the toddlers propped up in the trolleys...well except for that one kid I pulled a face at him, don't ask me why I just felt like it at the time. I believe it helps them to be wary of strangers when you do that. Consider it a service I am providing. Free of charge.

And may I just add Woolworths it was a pleasure to use yer rejuvenated trolleys...not once did I have to fight the thing to steer it...I fairly breezed along. Corners. Ha...what bleeding corners. No lower back ache. I almost felt like doing an extra couple of laps up through your aisle's just because it was such a novelty. In hindsight I should have because I had to wait for my sister to finish her shopping for what seemed bloody aaages.

The only monobrow moment I had was when hitting the birthday card aisle. At first I thought some reject had gone along and turned every mother loving card back to front...all I could see were rows and rows of white with the hallmark logo. WTF. And here I was having to pick out not one but two cards. Pick a spot, pull out card discover it's not worthy, return it, pick another spot ditto...ditto...ditto.

Well I soon got tired of that so when I spied a staff member crouched down further up the aisle...as if the cow was trying to hide from me...I strolled on up to her and asked what the deal with the card section was. "Oh we're doing a stock take, you can turn them around now"...so I did. Well not all of them just the one's I had looked at. Eventually I scored the appropriate cards. One has a dog with it's gob open as if its feral like with the caption It's your birthday...couldn't you just pee from the excitement. Yep okay the fourteen year old will like that. The other is a Stevo card...okay that takes care of the ten year old he's a dead keen [no pun intended] croc-hunter fan. Frig I hope it doesn't make him cry. Naah. He'll be right.

My sister and I done did something tonight that we have never ever done in all our shopping together history. We actually went inside Kentucky Fried instead of waiting in the drive-thru. Shock horror. Yes, well the long arsed line and us not being able to see the menu board did decide that one. For the life of us we don't understand why the menu board sits a fair bit ahead of the order box. You can't read the fucker. Why don't they have one before the squawky talkie box. I'm pretty sure that would speed up the line some.

Ahh wicked wings I do so like yers, three fer a buck 95...I can dig it.


Posted by apositivepessimist :: 12:36 pm :: 27 comments

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